There’s this fabulous pub in my neighborhood that makes spiked milkshakes. They are divine. I mean, what’s not to love about bourbon in your ice cream? I’ll tell you. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Unless you consider the calories, but shhh, let’s not speak of such things.
As my good friend once put it, “Counting calories is as damaging as counting the number of guys you’ve slept with.”
Some things just don’t need to be tallied.
(This also applies to counting the months and sometimes years of my accidental celibacy, but again, let’s not speak of these things.)
Back to bourbon, ice cream, and happiness.
The pub also serves a pretzel with a beer fondue sauce that will change your life. I need figure out how to make that as well, but I digress. Tonight I’m having a girlfriend over for a movie night, and I’m going to make some of those fabulous spiked shakes.
See, I promised Jerry, the sweet old guy up the street, that I would watch Gone With the Wind, and I have been putting it off. For weeks. Every time I stop to chat with him, he opens with, “Have you watched the movie yet?”
Each time I must hang my head in shame and admit that I have not.
I mean, the movie is FOUR HOURS LONG! Four. Hours. Long.
Just so you know, the last time I did anything for four hours uninterrupted, it was called sleeping. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the movie won Oscars and is all famous and shit, but I have about a 90-minute attention span, max. Sure, I have two film degrees, which means I have endured more long, obtuse “art” films than anyone should ever be exposed to unless they’re being tortured by a rogue terrorist cell, but there’s a reason I work in TV and not features now.
So anyway, I need to bribe myself to sit still tonight, and I need my friend Kim, and my friend bourbon, to force me to do it. This is why I’m making truffle popcorn and Spiked Old Fashioned shakes to accompany Margaret Mitchell’s masterpiece.
If you have a movie night coming up and want to mix it up a bit, the shake recipe is below and the popcorn recipe is here. You may not need bourbon and butterfat to sit still like I do, but it’ll make it more fun. I promise.
Spiked Old Fashioned Shake
2 C vanilla ice cream
4 oz bourbon whiskey
2 oz orange juice
¼ tsp Angostura bitters
3 maraschino cherries, plus one additional cherry for garnish
Whipped cream for garnish, optional
Scoop the ice cream into the blender. Add the next four ingredients and blend thoroughly. Pour the shake into a glass and garnish with whipped cream and a cherry.
Consume. Smile. Go into a creamy bourbon-induced coma while watching Scarlett O’Hara shout about Yankees in Tara for four hours.
OK, anyway, this Yankee is going to down some Kentucky Bourbon now.